Issue 232
July/August 2024


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Jul 24, 2024

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ArtWork Newspaper Issue 232
July/August 2024 (6.00MB)

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ArtWORK


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Artificial Intelligence to the aid of the creative industries…

An e-mail into ArtWork's in-box offers an exciting new service.

"We wanted to introduce you to PowerPlay.... Created for people who want to indulge a secret interest or passion for playwriting, PowerPlay offers an opportunity for aspiring playwrights to see their creativity come to life and their play performed on a London stage."

ArtWork writer Jick Nones imagines the potential. An executive style office in a high rise city block, all-round tinted glass, matt paintwork in several shades of grey, and shiny silvery metal bits. Mr Famedram is sitting at a desk, empty except for a closed laptop and a mobile phone, looking worried, drumming his fingers, and occasionally stomping round the desk, tearing his hair out. Enter a smartly dressed young lady with a slim file, conspicuously labelled "B The Creative U". She gestures Mr F to a sofa beside a low table.

"So Mr Famedram, thank you for choosing Cultura Creativa Consultants. How can I help?"
"A bad case of Publishers' Block, I suspect. I'm desperate."
"Desperate?"
"Exactly. My stringers, they're all washed out."
"Stringers?"
"Precisely. Parrots, the lot of them."
" Parrots?"
" You've got it in one...so intuitive. I'm relying on you to sort it out. Or else its curtains."
"Curtains?"
"For certain."
"Have you hired an influencer recently?"
" Good God no"

The young lady visibly flinches, a horrified look on her face.
"I don't trust them an inch… .waste of time and money. I know what my readers want?"
"And what do you think that is?"
"Independent, edgy, challenging, thoughtful, incisive, informed, provocative copy. Something they know they won't be able to read anywhere else."
"I thought so. Zeitgeist. You're totally out of touch with it. Live in an ivory tower, do you?"

She looks out at a cityscape spiked with shiny new tower-blocks.
" Excuse me?"
" So you do. Don't move. I just need a moment to think this through."

She goes out onto the balcony. Mr F paces round the sofa. A few minutes pass. She returns.
"OK, here's my analysis. Your problem is quite simple. People have been so betrayed by the media that they don't trust anyone or anything they read any more. For example, you mentioned the "G" word. Totally unacceptable these days. Far too loaded. It immediately triggers cancel culture."
" Cancel culture?"
" Mass withdrawal of support from anything socially or culturally unacceptable. Anything woke, for example."
"Woke?"
"Endorsing social inequality, racism, sexism… .most "isms" actually."
"Feels like I'm treading on thin ice."
"You are. Luckily, the answer is simple. DIY."
" DIY?"
"Let your readers discover their innate creativity by writing their own copy. That way they avoid any risk of reading anything upsetting to them, or any fake news. They also get to release their inner newshound, and see their name on the byline. Always an exciting moment."
"Hang on a minute. I've got more than 20,000 readers. How can this possibly work?"
"No problem. Cultura Creativa will handle all that, for a modest fee, of course, using state of the art AI and Chatbots. They're the way forward. You know they say businesses run much more smoothly without customers? Well, it's the same principal.
Publications run much more easily if the readers make up their own stories. Our bespoke service will save you all kinds of hassle. Chasing copy, deadlines, distribution… .all out the window. Just imagine the front cover:
"Calling all ArtWork readers! Be part of our future!"
"I must say it sounds appealing."
"One other point. The title. I suggest "ArtPlay".
"Work is so last year...who needs it?"



NORTHERN BOOKS FROM FAMEDRAM It's a half price offer with quote AW231 (usually £35/£25)

The Crafts in Scotland 1950-1990
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